The Mental Load of Motherhood is Exhausting and Overwhelming: 10 Strategies to Help

Learn about the mental load of motherhood and strategies to help you cope.

Your brain is constantly in overdrive...

You are thinking about what you need to feed the kids, are you needing any groceries?

I need to start the laundry, do the kids need bigger clothes?

What skills do I need to make sure the kids are learning right now?

Oh man the garbage is full again and the dishes are piling up in the sink…

The phone rings and confirms the dentist appointment for next week…

It never ends!

There is so much to keep track of and I feel like I am failing as a mom!

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What is The Mental Load of Motherhood

The mental load of motherhood is the invisible and exhausting work of managing a household and family.

This includes keeping track of and taking responsibility for all the tasks, big and small, that have to be done on a daily basis.

The Mental Load of Motherhood Can Include:

Tracking and managing appointments
shopping for groceries and household supplies
making sure everyone is dressed and fed
paying bills
scheduling activities
managing finances
It can also include managing your own and your children’s mental and physical health
as well as providing emotional support

The mental load of motherhood is often under-recognized and can be incredibly draining on a mother’s energy and mental reserves.

Why the Mental load of motherhood is so exhausting

The mental load of motherhood can be incredibly exhausting for many reasons. One common reason is the amount of multitasking that is required to juggle all of the responsibilities that come with being a mother. From managing the day-to-day tasks such as meal planning and grocery shopping, to managing long-term projects such as organizing birthday parties, making doctor appointments and keeping up with children’s school work, mothers often feel overwhelmed with the sheer amount of tasks they have to manage.

Additionally, motherhood often involves providing emotional and physical support to children, which can be draining and exhausting. On top of all this, many mothers are also working outside the home, further adding to the mental load. All of these factors can contribute to feelings of exhaustion and stress.

10 Strategies to Help and Cope with the Mental Load of Motherhood

Make time for self-care and relaxation. Schedule time for yourself, even if it's just a few minutes each day.
Have a support system. Find people you can talk to about your experiences and lean on for help when needed.
Practice mindfulness. Focus on the present moment and take deep breaths when feeling overwhelmed.
Get organized. A little bit of organization can go a long way in reducing the mental load of motherhood.
Reach out for help. Don't be afraid to ask for help from family, friends, or professionals.
Let go of perfectionism. Accept that it's impossible to be perfect and focus on doing the best you can.
Take time for yourself. Spend time with friends and family, pursue hobbies or interests, or just relax.
Get enough sleep. Sleep deprivation can cause stress and make it hard to cope with everyday challenges.
Exercise. Exercise helps to reduce stress and can help you to stay physically and mentally healthy.
Set realistic expectations. Don't try to do too much. Prioritize what's important and let go of the rest.

How to Make Time for Yourself as a Mom

As a mom, it can be difficult to find time for yourself. However, it is important to make time for yourself, as it can help you to stay healthy, energized, and focused.

Here are some ideas for how to make time for yourself:

Schedule time for yourself – Make a schedule for yourself, and set aside time for yourself each day or week. This could be a few minutes or an hour, depending on what is possible for you.
Take advantage of nap time – If you have young children who take naps, use this time to do something for yourself. Take a walk, read a book, or practice some self-care.
Rely on your support system – Ask family and friends to help out so that you can have some time to yourself.
Join a local mom group – Joining a local mom group can be a great way to find support and make time for yourself.

Ultimately, it is important to remember that taking care of yourself is essential for being the best mom you can be.

How to Practice Mindfulness as a Busy Mom

Being a busy mom can be stressful, but practicing mindfulness can help you stay in the present moment and gain perspective on your daily tasks.

Here are some tips to help you get started with mindfulness:

Take a few minutes each day to focus on your breathing. While you’re breathing, let your thoughts pass by like clouds in the sky, without getting caught up in them.
When you feel overwhelmed, try to take five minutes to focus on the sensations of your body and the environment around you.
When you’re feeling busy, take a few moments to focus on one task at a time, concentrating on the details and the movements.
Make time for just being in nature. Even if it’s just a five-minute walk in a park, being in nature can help you be more mindful.
At the end of each day, write down three things you’re grateful for. This can help you to appreciate the good things in life and stay mindful of them.

By making mindfulness part of your daily routine, you can stay present and more focused on your daily tasks as a busy mom.

Tips on How to Get Organized as a Mom

Being a mom can be overwhelming and it’s important to stay organized in order to be successful. Here are a few tips to help you get organized as a mom:

Make a list – Start by making a list of everything you need to do. This will help you prioritize tasks and stay organized.
Set aside time for yourself – Make sure you take time for yourself. Whether it’s a few minutes of yoga or an hour of reading, taking care of yourself is essential to staying organized.
Use technology – Technology can be a great tool to help you stay organized. Use your phone to set reminders and alarms, create to-do lists, and keep track of tasks.
Delegate tasks – Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Ask your family or friends to help with tasks that aren’t as important so you can focus on the things that are.
Let go of perfectionism – Perfectionism can be a hindrance when it comes to staying organized. Remind yourself that it’s OK to make mistakes and that you don’t need to be perfect in order to be successful.

By following these tips, you’ll be able to stay organized and be a successful mom.

How to Let Go of Perfectionism

Letting go of perfectionism can be a difficult process. The best way to start is to recognize that perfectionism is an unrealistic goal and to focus on setting realistic goals for yourself. It is also important to practice self-care, such as taking breaks from work, engaging in leisure activities, and spending time with supportive friends and family.

Additionally, it is helpful to challenge negative thinking patterns and to focus on the positives. Lastly, it is beneficial to recognize when perfectionism is leading to anxiety or stress and to take steps to reduce these feelings. Ultimately, letting go of perfectionism requires practice and patience.

Simple Exercises for Busy Moms

Exercise can be a great way to take care of yourself and boost your energy levels. Here are some simple exercises that you can do on your lunch break, with your kids, after the kids go to bed, or any other time you have a few minutes to spare.

Take a brisk walk either by yourself or with your kids. Load them up into the stroller or wagon to get outside into nature. Fresh air and exercise can do wonders for your energy levels and mood.
Try some chair exercises. Squats, calf raises, and tricep dips are all great exercises that you can do while sitting in a chair.
Get up and do a few jumping jacks or jog in place for a few minutes.
Do some yoga. There are many yoga poses that you can do in just a few minutes.
Lift weights. Even a few minutes of weight lifting can help tone your muscles.
I have found the app 7 Minutes to be very helpful in getting in a super quick exercise routine.

Remember, it doesn't have to be a lot of time or a lot of exercise to get some benefit from it.

How to Ask for Help as a Mom

As a mom, it can be difficult to ask for help, but it is important to remember that you do not have to do it all alone. Start by making a list of tasks you need help with and reach out to friends, family, or even hire a professional to help you manage your responsibilities. If you're not sure who to reach out to, look for local organizations or support groups that specialize in helping moms. Don't forget to take care of yourself too, and make time for your own mental and physical health.

You are a Good Mom Who is Having a Hard Time

I just want you to remember you are a good mom. You are just having a hard time managing the mental load of motherhood. The mental load is extremely hard and takes time to figure out what helps you. Be patient and kind with yourself. You are not defined by your anger, frustration, or overwhelm. You are the mom your kids need and they love you very much. I hope you find some of these tips helpful in your motherhood journey.